TIAADAS – The Djinn And I

Book of Desire

“Tell me… You have found me with great hardship and countless of adventures… I will grant you a wish. What do you desired most?” said the Djinn.

“Yes. I have traveled far. Seas to seas. Continents to continents. Cities to cities. In order to find someone who can grant me my wish. O Djinn, I desired death. Grant me death! For I do not belong in this world.”

The Djinn looked confused and puzzled.

“Why would you desired death? You look young. You look strong and reliable. You  look perfectly healthy,” the Djinn asked.

“O Djinn, I may look young, strong, reliable and healthy. Those are just physical appearances. No one knows the burden I carried. No one knows how my hopes were crushed. No one knows my disappointments. No one was there when I need them. No one understand how hard I tried to stay.”

“Are you sure you want me to grant you death? What about your family?”  asked the Djinn.

“I have long left them. They don’t need me. They may take good care of me but that is not what I want. I hate them. Ever since I was small. They doesn’t understand how I feel. They ruined my childhood. They fed me negativity. I carried the  burden alone and I am just a burden to them. I should have died younger when I had the chance. But still, here I am. Living and breathing. I should have died when I was a little baby but I am here still alive. They left me alone…”

“Are you sure you want me to grant you death? What about  your friends?” asked the Djinn.

“Friends? I am here alone. I cried alone. I was left alone. When I need them, they left me. When I  gave them my attention, they betrayed me. When I spend my time for them, they took me for granted. When I screamed for help… None came except to pass by and gave me a cold look. I believe in them but they did not trust me…”

“Are you sure you want me to grant you death? What about your lover” asked the Djinn.

“Hahaha. Lover? They left me when I need them the most. They left me in the dark. They took back the promises they made to me. They wound me and gave me scars. I gave my all. I tried my best. I never gave up on them. I keep the hope in me burning but they gave me to the cold wind.”

“Are you sure you want me to grant you death? What about your faith?” asked the Djinn.

“I believe in my faith. I know that I will damned to hell for eternity if I made this wish. The people around  me doesn’t have the same level of faith. They lost their faith. They do not trust their God. They disobeyed their God. If I am the only one left, let me just joined them. Or at least, let me leave them.”

“This is my last question. Are you sure you want me to grant you death? What about yourself?” asked the Djinn.

“I gave up. Every time I believe there was a spark of hope in my heart. It ended up as just a spark. Every time I gave myself a chance. The chance never came. Every time I let myself open. I ended up letting the wrong person in. Not to mention the stupidity and the sins I have committed. I am tired of trying. I am tired of believing. I am tired of hoping. I am tired of breathing. I am tired crying alone when I wished someone would believe in me and accept me in their life. I am tired finding the reason to hold this life. I am tired… of everything.”

“Then, let me grant your wish. However, I am a Djinn and not your Grim Reaper. I will left you with this dagger. Take it and take your own life. It is your choice. If you do not. It is your choice. To live or to die, it is your choice.” The Djin made a dagger magically appeared and put the dagger in front of him.

“Why can’t you just grant my wish and let me die without pain? Aren’t you a Djinn who grant wishes?”

“I am a Djinn, yes but I am not your Grim Reaper. Let you be your own.”

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