I keep asking myself

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I keep asking myself,
What holding me back?
Is it bravery?
Or am I scared?
So many escapes,
One over here and there,
Can’t it be anywhere?
I am overthinking,
When the path is easy,
Some just a leap away,
While others take a step,
A stab, a puff, a jab,
A momentary wings,
A mouthful of pills,
Where is my part,
No scars on my heart,

I am pitiful,
Playing the victim,
I am still young,
I can do many things,
Opportunities waiting,
Why age matters?
When the soul is old,
Weary and tired,
Pressured and swamped,
When I’m still here,
And I’m being selfish,

What do I have now?
One is a family,
Two is a girlfriend,
Three is a job,
Four is a life,
Four is a lie,
I feel lifeless,
Misery is borderless,
My mind is powerless,
Isn’t it obvious,
How one can suffer,
From his own mind,
Forever.

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