Ally’s Thoughts: LiSA – unlasting

Hey everyone, for the rest of the year 2020, this will be my theme song.

This is a Japanese song by LiSA called ‘unlasting’. While the official video is available, The First Take version definitely hits me to the core and left me shaken. Subtitle is available and I hope you would enjoy it.

I want to say a lot of things about the song but… Why don’t you decide it for yourself? Enjoy!

Ally’s Thoughts: The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society (2018)

Hi everyone,

I just finished watching The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society on Netflix. I added it on My List for quite some times. Only now I have the feel to watch it. I am glad not a second wasted on this movie.

The movie is based on a novel with the same title written by Mary Ann Shaffer and Annie Barrows that was published in 2008.

The movie is about Juliet, a writer from London received a letter from a book club in Guernsey called The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society. Yes, it’s a mouthful one indeed but there are circumstances. Led by curiosity, Juliet went to Guernsey to uncover the truth behind the book club.

As usual in Ally’s Thoughts segment, this is not a review of a movie but more on sharing few points and perspective that really caught my attention in the movie. There might be few spoilers around, if you don’t want to be spoiled, turn around now.

The place we truly belong

Perhaps, not everyone would resonate about it. However, there are people out there that are looking for a place they would call home, family, and longed for familiar connections with the people around them.

Imagine there are so many things going on in your life, suddenly, you feel that the thing that is happening to you feels so distant. While you have accomplished so much, yet, you still feel something missing.

That thought made you wonder and ponder, made you searched to understand. You are looking for an answer, no mediocre ones can really satisfy you. While everyone around you tried to convince you otherwise, you kept on and believe in the voices of your heart.

I believe that is what Juliet has experienced. She was not ready to settle in her current state. She still couldn’t get off her pasts and searching for something to give her strength to move on. She found a reason when she received the letter from Dawsey.

She was probably doubting herself a lot before making that decision. To step out and look for something. Driven by her curiosity and guts. She couldn’t let go. This was shown many times in the movie.

Even when there were resistance directly telling her to stop and carry on from the book club. She stayed in Gurnsey and building deeper connection with the club members. Her strong feeling keeps on guiding her to stay for the sake of uncovering the truth. In the end, she uncovered the truth about the club and the truth about herself. The truth about what she strongly believed.

I believe that there are plenty of times in my life, I tried to be rational about things. There are times when I decide to ignore my feeling and live up to the standard norm. Nothing wrong with that, the decisions were made by myself. There are no points in regretting them.

However, there are plenty of time as well that some decisions left my feeling to voice out louder. The feeling went so intense that I can’t ignore. Later, the feeling won over my rational decision.

Perhaps that was the decision that we truly belonged. Like there are forces that intervened and brought out new perspectives.

There are so many quotes from the movie I wished to share but there are not many available in the web. Even so, I would really love to share this one.

Such a small thing, just a book. Yet, it brought me all this way.

Juliet

There are times when the smallest thing in our life made us brace ourselves and brought out the courage inside us. Some may be insignificant to others but to us, it leads us to the place we truly belong.

Now, I really need to find the book and read it. That is how it usually happened to me. Movies first, then the books.

Ally’s Thoughts: My 1000th Post

Photo by Tyler Lastovich on Pexels.com

Hi everyone,

When I started this journey, I just want to write everything in my head and share it. I never thought mine are great or meaningful at all. All I want is to let things go and clear my thoughts and inspiration. Creating an outlet for my passion.

I realized the importance of writing everything along the way. There are times I feel stuck and things spiraling down. Every time I wrote them down, I feel liberated in some way. I can be too reserved that only pen and paper would be my outlet. I mostly have no one else to talk with except the walls.

It has been a great journey ever since. I get to read wonderful posts by the community. I get to make friends and even met some of them. It was a great experience too. I admit that there are times where I made errors and mistakes. I can be immature and selfish at times too. I am really sorry if I ever offended anyone here.

I have been reading back the posts here, there are times I feel like a different person. It feels like I don’t even remember writing them.

The truth is I am really tired now. I am tired of trying too. I am mostly working from home and rarely go out. So, that would probably be reason I have been having spiraling thoughts. At this moment, sleeping is the best thing going on for me.

Not really expecting my 1000th post to be something like this but I really need to write this away.

I wish everyone have a great day and stay safe!

Ally’s Thoughts: The Void to Fill

Image from: The Cinematic Katzenjammer

I recently re-watched the movie Her (2013). I did wrote about it in 2017. You can read it here: Ally’s Thoughts: Her (2013).

While watching it, I can’t help to think about myself. Three years ago, it feels different. I was much more optimistic and ‘energetic’. However, it hits differently now.

To have hope and passion can really drive someone forward. They move on to create something for themselves even if it is to the unknown.

Yet, it feels different now. The void that I thought I moved on from has returned. I know it will never disappeared but at least the void in me should be filled even a little.

Somehow, it is not. The void is like a wound starts to bleed again. It hurts but empty at the same time. It feels impossible to mend it or heal it.

I keep asking myself. What went wrong?

This is so ridiculous. Is it because how 2020 has been treating people? How it has been affecting me?

Is it because I lie to myself too much? Is it regret? Is it disappointment? I can’t tell. I am more confused now more than ever. It has been years. Why it still hurts so much?

The depth of this void me is endless. I don’t think it can be filled at all. This is honestly, too much.

Ally’s Thoughts: YOU (Season One Netflix Series)

Good day friends and readers,

Throughout the Movement Control Order imposed by the Malaysian government during the pandemic crisis, I managed to catch up with the highly rated Netflix series ‘YOU’. I am late but it’s better than never, right?

It has been a long time too since I wrote something for Ally’s Thoughts. So, I will share my thoughts about the series. Unlike any review, I will not review about the series in how good it is or how bad it is. My opinion on such will probably irrelevant and it will simply a bias perspective.

Therefore, as other Ally’s Thoughts posts, I will choose a theme or a perspective to share or discuss relating to the series.

For those who haven’t watch the series, more or less there will be spoilers. So, spoilers alert!

“Sometimes, we do bad things for the people we love.” – Joe

It’s true that we are able to do bad things for the people we love but no matter how much we want to justify it, bad thing is bad.

In Joe’s perspective, he did it to protect the person he loved. He would do anything to be by her side and keep her safe. Ironically in the end, he killed Beck, his lover.

I have been in love and I understand how loving someone can be hurtful. The good things lasts while it last. However, the bad and painful things stays like a scar forever even after it healed.

I always believe that relationship is not magic and will never reach ‘perfection’. There is no such thing because great relationships are built and made. My upbringing and my surrounding taught me, we can never satisfy everyone and it is normal to argue about something whenever we have differences.

The important thing is to work things out. For example, Joe killed Benji. It showed early the ‘love’ that Joe was experiencing was no longer attraction but more of an obsession. How could Joe work this situation out?

Don’t! He should just back off and give Beck some space. Why? In Beck’s perspective, Joe is a guess or a stranger in her life. Instead of trying to respect that, Joe did everything to justify his ‘love’ as a reason.

I’m sure we all can relate that there are times we come to other people’s life and there are times too when others came into ours. Some stayed, some left. In the end what is the point? It is all about the learning and lessons.

Other than that, the series is really entertaining and a must watch!

Ally’s Thoughts: Bitcoin is a scam? Part 1

Hi dear friends and readers,

As promised, this is the first part for Ally’s Thoughts: Bitcoin is a scam? Part 1. Again, Bitcoin is not a scam? Let me tell you why it is not.

A Digital Asset

Bitcoin (BTC) is a type of digital asset, also known as virtual asset, cryptocurrency, and virtual currency. Imagine a gold bar, Bitcoin is the gold of the internet. It is also similar on how our physical money, deposited into the bank and we transferred the money into our e-wallet or digital wallet.

Unlike normal currencies like US Dollar (USD), Japan Yen (JPY), or Malaysian Ringgit (MYR) issued by the country’s central bank. BTC is a decentralized asset. Which means, no entity have complete control over BTC. Doesn’t make sense? At first it is but nothing is impossible nowadays.

Decentralized Technology

You probably have been wondering how a type of asset are not centrally governed. BTC is using a technology called blockchain. Blockchain is a digital ledger that will record every transaction into a block and chained with the previous blocks. It is you are writing all the transactions in a book and after each page is verified, it will move on to the next page.

Normal book means you are the keeper, so you own the book and keep all the transactions right? That is not the case in blockchain because it is recorded and shared within its network. It is like everyone in your family have the same exact copy of the book and it is updated in real time using a system. Lets say you lost your book, you just need to copy from one of your family members and that’s it. Everything is there.

Limited Supply

Unlike physical money that is printed by the central bank, BTC is produced by the blockchain technology. How? Each new transactions and blocks will be verified and approved by a number of computers in the network. Once the transactions and blocks approved, the blockchain will reward each computers a certain amount of BTC.

Remember the example above about your family having the exact copy of the transaction book? Every time a transaction is recorded in your book, your family members need to verify and approve it. Then, they will be rewarded by the system.

However, the BTC supply is capped at 21 Million. Currently, it is around 18 Million in circulation. This is why Bitcoin is considered valuable for some people.

That’s all for this part. I am trying my best to get too technical. If there are anything that you want me to clarify, do write me a comment.

Ally’s Thoughts: Bitcoin is a scam? Intro
Ally’s Thoughts: Bitcoin is a scam? Part 1
Ally’s Thoughts: Bitcoin is a scam? Part 2


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Ally’s Thoughts: Bitcoin is a scam? Intro

close up of coins
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

Is it? Of course it is not. Scammers tricked unsuspecting desperate people thinking it is the fastest way to help their financial troubles.

Hi everyone,

Sorry for the long break and silence. I was pretty busy with work for the past few months until I no longer have one. Surprised? Me too.

I have been working in a media company that focused on cryptocurrency and blockchain technology. I have like zero knowledge about the industry and I was clueless. However, six months into it, I am not expert but I am moderately informed. So to speak.

I will share with all of you on what I have learned and acquired. Therefore, you will not be fooled or scammed by these scammers. I am here to raise awareness about what is Bitcoin and how to educate yourself about Bitcoin!

There are so many things I wanted to share, I will break Ally’s Thoughts into few parts. So, you won’t get confused or get a headache because of too much information.

Alright, let’s begin!

Ally’s Thoughts: Bitcoin is a scam? Intro
Ally’s Thoughts: Bitcoin is a scam? Part 1
Ally’s Thoughts: Bitcoin is a scam? Part 2


If you are new to my site, help me to grow my social media below! Thanks in advance 😀

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Ally’s Thoughts: Saying Goodbye to 2019

person holding a sparkler in macro photography
Photo by Kris Lucas on Pexels.com

Hi everyone,

We are here, in December and leaving 2019. The truth is, it was a really rough year for me. Too rough and I still try to stabilize the aftermath.

I want to share it here because I know that there are more out there having bad times, worst than mine.

After working for almost 2 years in a good place, I started to feel depressed. Early 2019, I got myself diagnosed and referred to a psychiatric clinic. Now, I’m under medication and having a new job.

For those who are struggling with mental illness, I hope you found the courage to break out from the void and get some help. Then, the real battle starts there because wanting to feel good and ‘normal’ is ridiculously hard.

It is hard to find someone you can trust, to share the things you are experiencing right now. Find the right channel and you are not alone.

Now, I am into 10 months under medication and I am still far away being healthy. However, slowly I feel my motivation is coming back. As I was going through all these, I realized so many things about my situation. It opened my eyes and I hope you will find it in your journey too.

Thank you very much for reading and visiting my site. I am sorry for neglecting my WordPress community with less posts and less visiting your sites. I am ashamed but I really feel good whenever I return here.

Wishing you all the best in the year 2020. May all of you receive great blessing and find success in the things you want to achieve. Happy New Year!

Ally’s Thoughts: To The World I Don’t Belong

silhouette of bird flying
Photo by amy chung on Pexels.com

Hi all,

Note that this is a post that has been in my draft since January. I was in a struggle with no chance of winning, well I was wrong. I haven’t win the war yet but the victory in the countless battles strengthened me.

Therefore, I am sharing this as a reminder for myself and to share how dreadful the feeling was at that time.

Thank you.


I think, this will be my last post. I am retiring, not as a writer but as a living breathing thing.

I have been struggling too long, too long that I don’t know why I’m still here. Too long that I don’t have any more reasons to reason with my inner self, “Why am I still here?”. I am too tired to argue again about it.

Family? No.

Friends? No.

Love? No.

Work? No.

Future? No.

Hell and eternal damnation? No.

It is too tough to keep going only to be hopeful and telling myself that everything going to be alright. Everything will eventually work out. No. It doesn’t work that way. The situation and surrounding is just too ridiculous. It is petty too.

My effort? I tried. Many times.

I learned to accept. Doesn’t work.

I learned to forgive. Doesn’t work.

I learned to love. Doesn’t work.

I learned to better person. Doesn’t work.

I learned to believe. Doesn’t work.

I learned to fear. Doesn’t work.

I learned to trust. Doesn’t work.

I learned to forget. Doesn’t work.

I learned too much that it drove me crazy.

Until the very end, my inner self still want to reason with me. I had enough. Too much conflict in my head and it is too tiring. Not to mention the conflicts outside my head.

I can’t function properly.

I can’t breath properly.

I can’t love properly.

I can’t live properly.

I can’t. I won’t.

I gave up. Too long… Too long…

For my last words, I am not apologizing. I want to say my gratitude for keeping me this long. I had wished for it since I was 10 and I never get it. I was not brave enough to take it myself. I envy the others who decide to do it. Thank you.

“I tried and I did not fail. I just stopped and took a long stop.”


 

Ally’s Thoughts: Write Ally! Write! Celebrating 3 Years And 2K followers and NaPoWriMo 2019!

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Hello everyone,

This is one overdue post and I apologize for the delay. I am happy to share that Write Ally! Write! is now 3 years old. Plus, now it have around 2K followers! Thank you to my fellow friends, readers and followers all across the glove. I really appreciate it.

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I am sorry again for not being able to deliver a lot of thoughts or poems. I also have not been replying to comments. It has been very difficult for me because of real life.

However, March is leaving and April is coming. I am sure our community can’t wait for April because of the National Poetry Month (NaPoWriMo) or the Global Poetry Month (GaPoWriMo).

I joined NaPoWriMo 2017 where I have compiled my 30 days poems in the e-book, The Thirty Days. You can download the e-book free using the link below.

The Thirty Days by Ally Mare

You can also check my profile and my other e-books using the link below.

Ally Mare profile @ Smashwords

I missed NaPoWriMo 2018 because of my tight schedule but I am pledging myself to join NaPowriMo 2019. I would like to invite my fellow poets to join as well.

Like previous years, I will visit NaPoWriMo.net for their daily prompts and you can do the same too.

That’s all for now. Can’t wait for the 1st prompt. Wishing you all the best and have a great day!