I don’t need sleep to dream

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I don’t need sleep to dream,
To run away from reality,
To seek refuge in comfort,
To fill the void in me,

I just need an idea,
To believe in fantasy,
To imagine the unseen,
To live in illusion,

I live in the sweetest lie,
A blanket to cover,
All the ugliest truth,
All the corrupted thoughts,

I hide within myself,
As I tear it inside out.


We’ll never find perfection

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We’ll never find perfection,
Except for a standard ruled by others,
It is always our own expectation,
Wanting perfection in a specific way,

Nor it is about lowering expectations,
Nor it is about settling for less,
It is about us and our perceptions,
It is about us and our needs,

The need to meet expectations,
The need for perfection,
The actual need to compensate,
For the things we lost.

Selagi tekun kita berpaut.

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Hujan lebat sepanjang malam,
Deruan angin memecah sepi,
Terngiang ucapan salam,
Masih terpahat di dalam hati,

Menyelak album memori lama,
Harta peninggalan tidak ternilai,
Walau hidup tanpa warna,
Masih segar ingatan tersemai,

Jalan di hadapan masih jauh,
Tidak kelihatan arah laut,
Sabar itu ibarat sauh,
Selagi tekun kita berpaut.

Except for accepting everything that happened.

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Today I went out,
I sat on a bench,
The weather was hot,
Yet the wind brough comfort,
The sky was bright blue,
With hints of clouds,

What a sight!
A peaceful scene,
Like a painted memory,
From the strokes and brushes,
Of a talented painter,

But the thoughts,
Turn vicious and wild,
The doubts polluted the air,
Sowing seeds of uncertainties,

Tears fell down,
Tighten chest,
Gasping for air,

In that moment,
I desire nothing,

Except for accepting everything that happened.

Sorry, I Gave Up by Ally L is now available!

Hi friends and readers!

A new poetry e-book by Ally L is available now! The new e-book, Sorry, I Gave Up is a compilation of poems written between 2018-2019. The theme is about how some people took a different path in life and found themselves in difficult places. Download it for free!

Sorry, I Gave Up is the fourth e-book since my last one. The last one was published in 2017. The main reason I published it is that I want to make it easier for others to read my work. It might be a hassle to go to my website and go through each post one by one. So, like what I did years ago, the new e-book will cover all the poems I posted here from 2018 till 2019.

When I was compiling all the poems, I realized a strong main theme, hardship. If I recall correctly, those two years were mostly about me being busy with work and how it took a toll on my creativity. I was too busy that I don’t really have time for myself, or to connect and socialize with others. I got myself plunged into depression and I feel that I lost my creative self.

Hopefully, this will help me to be motivated to compile more and complete a couple of personal projects. Again, please help by downloading the book and giving it a review. It will make my day happier. Wishing everyone a great and productive week ahead!

This time to sleep.

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I fall down on my face,
Slipped from nothingness,
As I pushed my hands up,
I saw the view of heaven,

The sun smiles and shines brightly,
Fitted in between two mountains,
Grassy fields stretched between me,
And a hint of woods and bushes,

Then, the after-rain scent,
Filled the air around me,
Rousing me to get up faster,
And search the clouds,

As I look around closely,
I found a cave,
Hidden between the bushes,
Moist, wet, and slippery floors,

Another gush of golden rain,
Passes by with a sweet taste,
Honey-like washing me,
Cleansing me from my sins,

I took shelter inside the cave,
Warm and nurturing,
Until I fall again,
This time to sleep.

He left his squared glass chamber

He left his squared glass chamber,
Without looking anywhere else,
Except for the large view outside,
Cars down the road,
A branch of the slow current river,
Still of countless tall buildings,
And the vast cloudy sky,

He stared outside,
Yet his mind filled,
Thoughts flying far away,
Like a released arrow,
None can peek,
Yet everyone sees,

The raised eyebrows draw concern,
Of his livelihood,
And the well-being of his staff,
Before the legacy he built,
Crumble, unlike the still building,
In front of him.

If you want it too

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How long has it been?
The door to your heart,
Has been locked in tight,

How long has it been?
Since your drying heart,
For a drop of love,

How long has it been?
Of all the wishes,
That never granted,

How long has it been?
You’ve been standing still,
Waiting for something,

Reaching out my hand,
So, I could grab yours,
And let’s get away,
From here and the pain,

And I will help you,
If you want it too.

Of a broken system

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A long daily journey,
As early as the sun,
Together in harmony,
Boards the awaited train,

Wait at the same spot,
Stand at the same section,
View from the same window,
But is it the same train?

The repeating routine,
Of a broken system.

Why am I still fighting to move forward?

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There is nothing good will ever come out of my mouth,
Only deep numbing frustration like compacted powder of emotion,
There is no patience and solace except the happy finger anxiety,
And the words to let out are like knives and blades coated with poison,

What is kindness when they are the ones being punished?
What is patience when the world is filled with ignorants?
What is fairness when they are the ones being abused?
What is a family when they are bringing the home down?

Yet, I can never understand the main question,
Why am I still fighting to move forward?